Sometimes I Have Suicidal Thoughts Triggered By Treatment From Deposed Kano Emir, Aminu Ado Bayero After My Father’s Death —Late Emir’s Daughter, Princess Zainab Bayero

Princess Zainab J. Bayero, the daughter of a former Emir of Kano, Ado Bayero, who ruled from 1963 to 2014, has faced evictions after the death of her father. She shares her ordeal and struggles with SaharaReporters.
 

How have you, your brother and mother been coping since your father’s demise?

Well, it's a very difficult situation we are caught up in. My mum, my brother and I have been trying very hard to start a new life ever since my dad's demise 10 years ago. But it's been very tough, and right now it's getting even harder to hold on.

It's like we're in a situation where we don't know how long we can keep doing things, sustaining our lives, but people think maybe it's just a joke but it's the truth. You are in a situation where you are stranded, homeless and don't have any means of survival.

Right now, my mum is not strong. She feels ill. She's feeling very sick and I'm not so strong myself. My brother is okay physically, but emotionally he is really torn apart also. It's a very difficult situation when you have nowhere to run to: no one cares about your survival. It's tough, really tough, because we were pushed out.

I think the Kano Emirate, my father’s sons and everyone just sabotaged us. Every move I make is being sabotaged. It's like our rights, our freedom, our liberties to live a normal life are being trampled upon and it's very heartbreaking.

You have talked about how you, your mother and your brother were held hostage in a Lagos hotel over debt. What happened?

We were in a very tight spot and it was like two weeks over there and then suddenly the hotel said we had to pay up and we didn’t have the financial ability to do that at that point, even though we were trying to. And then suddenly they were like, we can't leave, we can't get out of the premises.

We were there for like a day and a half and we were just so traumatised by the experience. You feel your freedom is being taken away and it was really scary and terrifying. We felt so miserable and uncomfortable.

The whole experience was very embarrassing. So to come from such a background where you are royalty, your father was a powerful man and you should have at least the comforts of life, like it is not even comfort, it is a necessity where you should feel safe in your own home, lock your door and be free to move around when you can. Then all of a sudden because you didn't want to be out on the streets with nowhere to sleep, you decided to stay somewhere because you wanted to feel safe, and that same space took away your ability to move again. It was really, really scary. And there was no one to call.

Were you physically or verbally assaulted?

No, there was no physical assault or anything like that. We just tried to properly end the situation, and they were not really listening to us. It was very difficult to get them to understand. It was really tough. We spent hours trying to come to an understanding and we were exhausted physically, emotionally, mentally because we didn't know what to do. We had to stay at the bar area because we couldn't go back into the room as we had to sit and were there for like 24 hours.

How was the matter resolved?

Well, my mum finally tried to calm them down, so we wrote an undertaking that by the end of the month - this December - we would make the payment and that was the reason why they let us go without signing documents.

How are we talking about?

It’s about N800,000.

How did the experience make you feel?

It's just too embarrassing honestly. Even the first time I spoke out about these personal experiences, I was just having sleepless nights. I felt so ashamed. I never wanted to talk about it. The first time I talked about anything was about my project, as a filmmaker, my documentary about my late dad. That's what I wanted the public to know about me. That's what I wanted them to see.

Like a talented young woman who is trying to make a difference, who is passionate about film-making, who is a writer, who wants to achieve so much of her ambitions, who has dreams. I never wanted to open up my personal life or my personal struggles. I didn't want the public to know. We focused on that aspect and it overshadowed what I was trying to do. For a long time, even though we were going through this hell, even while I was promoting the documentary, we were going through this same hell, but I didn't want to speak about it because I was so embarrassed.

I didn't want people to know that someone like me was going through something like this. I felt that it wouldn't be right for people to know and that it would be an embarrassment to me, to my mum, even to my late dad's memory, that it would be so wrong. But I had no choice because at that point when I spoke out about my personal life, my mum's health was at risk. I had no choice but to forget about my reputation and my embarrassing situation and speak up because I was trying to save my mum.

There's no time that I speak out about the situation that I don't feel embarrassed or don't feel ashamed, even though I know it is not my fault, but I feel so ashamed and also about the negative comments I always get.

Why is she doing this? Is she a princess that is begging? Is she not lazy? It's nothing like that. It's not easy to understand your situation when you come from a home like this. It's very difficult to survive in the world without any tools.

For 10 years after my dad died, I didn't get back to school. People were saying why but you can't steal or do negative stuff to survive. I'm on the right path and that really is difficult sometimes when you are on the right path, you don't want to go negative or do sinful acts to survive, but it gets very difficult to survive sometimes. But people don't really understand that.

And when you are being sabotaged, it even makes it more difficult. You try to get help. It is not begging; it is getting help to start. Even if you want a job, someone will help you. Everyone that succeeded in the world today had help at one point or the other from someone.

Even if you talk about tech billionaires or anybody in the world, they had someone who helped and believed in their dreams. But when you meet people and they don't help you because they say they need permission from your father’s sons, or they need the emirate’s permission, it is so confusing. They just shut down on you.

It is not like a lion in the jungle that's going to help you, it is the human beings like yourself that are supposed to help you climb the ladder to get to where you want to go. But with me and my brother and my mum, that's not the case.

I think people are painting another picture, giving people a false picture of who we are, claiming that we squandered (funds), that we have everything.

Why would my mother stop her kids from going to school? Does that make sense? Where are the properties? We didn’t inherit anything. We were not given anything, but they don't want to make themselves seem like the villains.

They make it look like we have everything, we are just lying. I don't know, but I think there's a story that has been spread by the other side of the family and that is why we are in this situation.

I’m a woman who is trying to survive. Even right now, I’m being sabotaged in the media. I think this sabotage is coming from the Emirate for me not to speak up.

I am not interested in the (Emirate) tussle. I don't have any business with that. I just want to survive. But it's like some players in that particular game are trying to stop me because all my life they have been trying to stop me from speaking out, from surviving. And it's getting worse.

They are using their position in power and political power to enslave us. I would say people don't get it. This is a human rights issue. It’s like when men are in power and they feel that they can abuse women because they have power, they have the money, they have the political influence, and they feel they can tell you what to do, how to act, how to live your life, that your life is in the hands. If you want to break free, they feel they can control you.

The first time my mum ever spoke out about our situation about nine years ago, one of my father's sons sent the SARS (Special Anti-Robbery Squad) to come after us. I don't know if it was to kill us or to abduct us, but we escaped. And till now, this is what's going on. They stopped everyone from helping us. And that is unfortunate and no one is trying to help.

I've been speaking out to the federal government, the state government. No one is listening to my plea. As a citizen, as a princess of Kano, I’m crying out to my government to help and save me, but they are supporting these same people that are abusing me. Because they feel they need them, but what about the citizens’ rights? Isn't that important?

Why would you be supporting people that are abusing their father’s kids, that don't want their father’s kids to go to school, to have a home and they claim they want to be leaders? That want to be kings when they don't care if their father's kids are on the street?

Sometimes I have suicidal thoughts. I've never said it because I know as usual, the Nigerian public will judge me weak, but it is the truth. The pain is too much and I don't know why no one wants to help.

Even right now, we are in the same situation again. We have nowhere to go in the next three hours. We slept somewhere last night because for days we've been so weak with nowhere to go and today again I know they're not going to let us stay, so we're going to be back on the street with nowhere to go.

And this is the festive season. Lagos is dangerous. Our properties are much, we don't know where to take them. It's so scary. It takes a lot to put myself out there because I'm a very shy person. I'm a very private person but because of the situation I don't know, will I die?

You said you have been ignored by Nigeria. Why did you mean by that?

Well, not every Nigerian. What I'm saying is the people I'm even speaking to are people that are in positions of power. I believe the government or people in positions should protect citizens because that's what the country is about. This is democracy, right? You should protect the rights of your citizens.

A citizen is complaining and crying out that she's in trouble, saying that her rights have been taken, that she's in danger, that she doesn't feel safe. But the governor came to me at that point but he just pulled back again.

The current Emir of Kano, Mohammadu Sanusi II, a few weeks ago, gave a speech about believing in women, believing women should have rights, believing that women should be allowed to achieve their dreams, that he believes so much in women and education.

This is exactly my story. And he knows about this too, so I don't really know why he's not helping or reaching out to me either. I know my father’s sons hate me, they hate my mum, they hate my brother, fine, I don't care about that. I know they wish we don't exist. But he's now the current Emir and he is someone who is very exposed and has achieved so much so I expected him to intervene in the situation.

He also knows what it feels like to be in the crosshairs of my father's sons. So I don't understand. And even the government, the governor, I don't know why he pulled back. He feels why did I talk about him. I didn't talk; I just said I needed more help because it's the state's funds and I’m part of Kano state.

My father was Emir of Kano for 51 years. I am not being entitled, I just know that the daughter of a man who served Kano for 51 years should be given the protection of a home, shelter and education and be given the means to promote her career by the government, which every other Kano citizen has a right to. I also have a right. And my brother Ahmed Tijjani also has a right to it, as the son of the late Emir of Kano. That is what I'm trying to say.

It's so embarrassing and bizarre, like what did we do wrong? Why are we hated by our government, by people? I don't get it. I don't understand.

Why did you say your other siblings believe you, your brother and your mother don't deserve to exist?

Because the amount of hate and anger that has been coming from them is so scary. Ever since my dad died, they have become so hateful. Any move we make, anything we do, they just show this hate. It's so scary and surprising.

It's like they wish we were dead. That's the only thing I see because why would you be comfortable to see your siblings on the street? They see what I'm saying and hear, but they ignore me totally. Like, yeah, go on, die, we don’t care. That's what I get.

Even when I was talking about the documentary, they also sabotaged me from launching it. A lot of people I approached said no. They said they don't want any part of it. Don't help her. They don't want me to be financially independent to take care of my brother and mother.

He claims he has the right to be the Emir and no one has the right to take that away from him. But he is taking away our rights. He took away the inheritance estate, but he's claiming to go to court and that no one has the right to take the throne from him and everyone in Bayero’s family has a right to the throne.

When you say he, who are you talking about?

Yeah, the deposed Emir of Kano, Aminu Ado Bayero.

How would you describe the situation when your father was alive?

When my dad was alive, he was the patriarch of the family. So he was in control and so everyone would try and pretend that they were a happy family. We accepted one another, so no one showed what they truly felt. It was all lovey-dovey.

Does it mean you noticed cracks at the time your father was alive but everybody pretended that things were fine?

Yes, there were some points when that I noticed it before he died, like when he was elderly, you know, he was getting much older and was ill. So at those times, there were some cracks. You could see that things were not going to be the same but I never imagined it would be this bad though. But there were some instances when you could feel some of the resentment.

You said that your crime was speaking out publicly as a Muslim woman and having a mother from Southern Nigeria. What were the things you said publicly that you think you are being punished for?

Even before I came out into the media space for this documentary, like I was saying, even before I ever spoke out in the media, they'd been judging us and been against us. I think we know there's a lot of bigotry in Nigeria.

There is this diverse ethnic sentiment in Nigeria and it is getting worse. But with my mum and I, I think my dad's family has this resentment that we are strangers; that we are not from the north and trying to change things.

I've always known that northerners are not very welcoming to strangers; it's no secret. My father was always trying to preach peace. But it's unfortunate that even the people that he raised don't believe in unity.

They come out and claim that they believe in unity but it's not true. It's just words; they are trying to please the public, but it's very different. It's not something that just started.

And when I came out, I wasn't talking about them. I wasn't talking about how much they had punished us. I was just talking about my project. Even at that point, they didn't want me to talk about the project. They didn't want me to be seen. They don't want me to be seen talking or being out there because my mum is not from the north and I am a woman who has a voice.

That was the reason they stopped me from getting a degree in the first place. They felt that without going to school, I wouldn't have the ability to create or to be smart or intelligent. That's one of the reasons they did that to me. They were trying to cripple me. But I still came out with a different project and they are still attacking me. When I was speaking about the project, I wasn't saying anything negative.

The project is not negative. It is a documentary celebrating a Great King’s life. But later, I started getting comments on the Internet that ‘she doesn't cover up, she is not a proper Muslim girl’. Come on, we are in the 21st century.

We live in a world where Muslim girls are free to do what they want, where Muslim women are activists. They want their voice to be heard. They want to be allowed to dress how they want. They want to be free to choose if they wear the hijab or not.

Why would Nigeria, which is a secular country, be so against me because I choose to wear jean trousers and T-shirts? That's just me being me, having a right to choose how I want to dress and express myself, but I'm being judged for that, I’m being judged for being vocal.

That is how it is in the Muslim world. It is about patriarchy where they are against women speaking out. In Afghanistan, I see they've created a law where women can't even have their voice heard in public. But this is Nigeria.

I'm not in contention for the crown of Kano. I'm not going to be the queen of Kano, so I don't know what the problem is, why they are so threatened by me.

There must be something that is rubbing them the wrong way but I don't know. I've never offended them. I didn't stab them in the heart with a knife. So I don't know why I deserve to not exist. Why are they torturing me psychologically and emotionally? Maybe it’s because I’m Ado Bayero’s daughter. Whether they like it or not, I'm his daughter and they can't deny that.

Do you see any other princess in the Kano royal home speaking out or in the media? No, I'm the first.

Any specific instances of physical abuse or direct harassment on the basis of your mother being from the South?

Yeah, just the feeling of when you go to a place, people staring, and the way they react. When you come in, the atmosphere changes. It's just so obvious that you're making them uncomfortable for no reason.

They kind of hate that my mum is younger and she has a strong will and has raised us to be that way, to be disciplined and strong.

And yes, sometimes when we were in the north, when we used to go to the palace or their houses, when we used to want to try and make peace, people around them like their staff used to harass us, like they'd be screaming and saying we should not to be there; banging doors.

There was a day when we went to the house of one of my family members’ and one of them was trying to get physical with us and it was so shocking. We went to his house - my mum, brother and I - and suddenly the people were pushing my brother and saying no, you can't come in here.

And it was my senior brother who said we should come but suddenly the staff members and his wife were fighting my brother. My brother had to protect my mum. And later, one of the girls, his daughter, called me. I thought she wanted to apologise, rather, she said, “If we were there, we would have killed your mum and your brother.” Yes, that was what she said.

I said what and she said, “Yes, you were lucky we were not there when your mum and brother were trying to force themselves to see our father. If we were there, it would have been your mum and brother’s dead bodies.”

I don't know her name but she called me on the phone and told me that. She is one of the daughters of one of our eldest brothers. I don't want to say his name, but that is the truth.

You also said that men of the Emirate abuse your rights. Can you explain how they do that?

Well, it's mostly my father's family. Yes, mostly my father's sons, I would say. When you grow up, you're supposed to have access to education, shelter, healthcare, and other basic things to be able to feed and take care of yourself.

But when you don't have a home and don't have the ability to get a job or what it takes to get education, how are you going to survive? And this is happening because you come from a certain family, because your father’s sons, when he passed on, decided that they were going to punish you and make sure you don't have access to all these.

It becomes difficult to survive because you can't get the tools you need to survive. And any time you try to find a way to survive, to create something, they sabotage it. I know even if we had started a business, these people would have sabotaged it, even burnt the place down.

That's how dangerous they are. That's why my mum never ever tried to have a business in Kano.

There was a time when my father tried to get us some shares in an oil company in Port Harcourt.

He said that they should give us some shares there before his death so that we could have some money and move on, but Aminu Ado Bayero was also in charge of that area. He made sure he didn’t let my father and anyone there give us shares of that company.

So this sabotage had been going on even when my father was alive.

He (Aminu) and his brother wish we died. These people claim to be fathers and they don't care about other people's kids. They don't care about their father's kids. They don't care that a woman is in pain.

When you cried out about the hotel debt, did you get financial support from the Emir of Kano, Muhammadu Sanusi II?

No, it was the governor that sent us money to settle the debt. It wasn't the emir - nobody from the emirate. It was the governor.

Wasn’t what he sent you more than enough to take care of the hotel debt and take care of you, your brother and mother?

Like I said, what transpired with the governor started on a positive note and I was so happy that he had come to my rescue at that point. I was thinking that it would all end finally. I was really grateful to him for settling that debt.

But I didn't get the opportunity to see him one-on-one and that's what I wanted. I wanted my mum, my brother and I to see him and discuss our situation one-on-one and resolve it finally because I felt that that was the way he would understand what we need and how to deal with it.

But the person he sent didn't let that happen. He kept saying he would, but he didn't. He said he was the one that was going to be the intermediary between us, and that was what led to the breakdown because we didn't have access to him.

Right now, someone has been asking us to leave the hotel we are in. This is another hotel.

The governor offset one hotel bill and you have just mentioned another N800,000 hotel bill yet to be paid …

No, this is a newly accumulated one. The one the governor settled is different. We were about to be evicted from there without anywhere to go. So the governor came and settled the debt. Then we left the hotel. So this one that just happened was last week. It's a recent issue.

And like I said, there was no communication between us and the governor personally. So that's why I think he wasn't really able to understand what we were trying to seek from him to end it completely. At a point when I tried to reach out to him the second time in the media, I was being bullied that I was greedy and that I squandered the money he gave us and I don't know where that came from.

And the money he gave wasn't like at once; it was in installments, like about four times, and it wasn't enough for us to get a permanent home and for my brother to return to school and get a business.

That was why I was saying that we wanted a home, to have a permanent home. It's like it got really negative and the governor shut down and the people around him were bullying me and putting the story out there that I was playing a game. I'm not playing games. I'm just trying to survive.

You also called on the president. Has the presidency said anything regarding your plight?

No, the President has not reached out to me, and I've called on him several times in the media. He has not sent anyone, and I'm so shocked. I don't know why. It is so surprising. I expected that as the president of this country, he would reach out.

Earlier, you said somebody was just knocking on the door of your hotel, asking you to vacate. What is going to be your fate?

I don't know. My mum, like I told you, is not strong. She's sick and my brother is also emotionally drained and I am also not strong. We don't know where we're going. We don't know what to do. We don't even know where we're going to be by the end of the day or what is going to happen to us. This is what we've been going through.

We have been living in tension and fear for years. And I don't know why the president, as a father and grandfather, doesn't want to hear the plea of a young girl trying to save her family.

I’m embarrassing myself coming out every day in the media. I don't know why no one would hear our plea. Maybe he believes that by helping me, he's going to offend the deposed Emir Aminu Ado Bayero. But that's unfortunate.

He's the president, he should care about every citizen, not about Aminu Ado Bayero and him claiming to be the rightful emir. That is not the only problem facing Nigeria.

Have you made an attempt to go to your maternal home?

There's nothing left for her or for us there because my mother’s parents died decades ago. The only person who was helping her, Tony Momoh, also passed on a few years ago.

He also made calls to Ganduje to help us at a point when he was the governor. Tony Momoh was a strong APC chieftain. He approached Ganduje to help us, give us a home and help us get scholarships.

We even saw him in Abuja and he said he will help. But Ganduje decided not to help.

With all that you and your family members are going through, are you giving up on your filmmaking career and women's rights activism?

No, I don't want to give up on my film career because I feel that as a creative woman, I have so much to showcase. I have so much to write about. Even my life experiences will inspire great stories and I intend to tell great stories about women and I intend to fight more for women.

So I really want to be an advocate for women's rights, especially when men want to take advantage, abuse or sexually assault them in different ways. I really want to fight for women not to be in this kind of situations and for widows and single mothers. I want to help young girls across the world who are trying to make a way for themselves but are being abused or frustrated by patriarchal society or men.

The governor of Kano State is part of our family. He is also a family member. So he is also supposed to care that someone from the family is going through this because it's shameful. It's not just a shame, it's a shame on the royal family. I think the Emir of Kano Muhammadu Sanusi II and the governor should know that it is not right for members of the royal family to be going through this and living like this.

It diminishes the family status in the public eye.

And no, I don't intend to give up on my dreams. If I can survive this hell, then I would fight for people in similar situations to find a way out. I will fight for women, for out-of-school kids. If I have the ability to survive and make it, I will definitely help people.